The etiquette of winning
Do you know any rich people?
How many multi-millionaires do you know? Not the guy you once met at some snooty black tie event that you had to attend to impress your boss. We’re talking about a close, personal friend. If you do, you’re pretty lucky, and hopefully they spoil you rotten with small gifts from their travels to exotic places on their gazillion-foot yachts, complete with two helipads and a smaller boat to zip around the sun-soaked islands to sip on cocktails. But if you’re one of the majority that are not so lucky, it’s good to know a millionaire who you can learn from – because when you win Mega Millions, you’ll need to start acting in a certain way.
Why rich people are different
Yes, rich people are different. They even smell better, for some reason. There is a theory that the super-rich bathe in lamb’s milk and dry their skin with unicorn pelts, but that could just be a vicious rumour started by us not-so-rich out of sheer jealousy. More than likely. The fact remains that rich folk get to have more fun because they see more and do more. And with this ‘more’, comes having to act in a certain way. Whether it’s dressing for the appropriate occasion, choosing the correct cutlery to use in a white-linen restaurant or simply how to greet a fellow rich person, these are the things you need to know for when you win Mega Millions one day.
Never talk about money
You’ll notice that rich people do not talk about how rich they are. That’s because if you have so much of something, you don’t find it that interesting anymore. Hairy people do not talk about how hairy they are. It’s kind of the same. So when you come into your millions after winning Mega Millions, you don’t want to come across as rude or crass. You’re more than welcome to chat about fast cars and Spanish villas – because you own a few of those – but never how much it costs. That will give you away as someone who has just come into money and you won’t be invited to do the things that other rich people do. We wouldn’t know, but please do tell us once you find out.
Dress the part
They say that clothes maketh the man. Or woman. So looking the part is all about the right outfit for the right occasion.
You won’t need the money, after you win Mega Millions, but if you happen to get bored and want to delve back into the workforce then you can never go wrong with an open collared shirt and smart trousers or for a more formal look, a good suit for men. For the ladies, a good blouse and pencil skirt should do the trick. If all else fails, think back to what your boss used to wear, and dress like their boss. And always, always get your butler to polish those shoes.
The black tie look is timeless. That goes for women too. That little black dress that you picked up inside the boutique next the first class boarding lounge should do the trick.
Learn about horses
For some reason, rich folk are obsessed with horses. Not the tacky track days where you throw your money at the teller and pick ‘Daddy’s Delight, first place, race 7’. We’re talking about pristine lawns and women with very large hats. The best way to learn about horses is to buy a few – and with your new newfound riches from winning the lottery, you should be able to buy a few stable hands to take care of them.
You’ll find yourself in many art galleries. Now, the trick here, when appraising a piece of art – even if you haven’t the faintest clue what the artist was smoking at the time – is to cock your head to the side and nod knowingly. This could be followed by a pensive ‘hmmm’, while reaching for another glass of French bubbly.
Find out where the trendy places are to eat before anyone else, and book a table near the entrance. That way, other people will assume that you know the owners. But of course you do. You’re rich now. People want to know you. If it happens to be a white-linen establishment, the easiest way to remember the cutlery etiquette is to start from the outside and work your way in. Simple.
We hope these tips will put you in good stead for when you win the lottery and start rubbing shoulders with the rich and famous. Now go get those Mega Million tickets!